dreamingofparis

I haven't been on this fantastic site in forever! It's hard to update about soooo much.. but we will leave it at i'm still heart broken.. but maybe there is hope. i'm still doing something i shouldn't.......... i'm an idiot and now i'm a senior in high school... 17 and insane. sometimes i just want life to end.. but really this isn't the kat everyone knows and loves..She is funny and great and always there for you.. with a smile on her face... Who i am right now isn't her.. who i am right now is... a reject..  a self involved whore. I'm no where near who i was so many months ago.. i was close to it.. about a month ago.. i was in love.. a

Entitled..... Fuck It.. is it possible to feel so much and not feel it in return.....? you would think that a force so power like love would be fueled by the emotions of (not just one heart but) two hearts.  Is it possible to feel so strong.... to pine... to desire over someone that may or may not have those feelings for you..? the awkwardness continues in all my relationships? but i ask.. is it my turn to be lonely? i went through my life being the lonely one (in relationships i mean.. no offence to my bestest friends in the whole wide world...) and then i was the girl with the girl... lol.. i had a relationship (of course i'm making light

Illusion I am the feeling, I become it, i feel it. There is the wind, Blowing myself into a confusion. There is the air, Lifeless and still. The two together is me. The force together is the feeling. But life is an Allusion. It's been seen before, Like an endless cycle. And life is an Illusion, Often fooling I, Fooling us, Into believing there is hope. anyways.. here's my thing.... i'm excited... like truely really fantastically EXCITED (i don't think those words go together.. but i'll move on) but i think my excitement is in vain. Have you ever felt something was there... but its not? well not that isn't not there.. but that